Avatar — The Best Damn Implausible Persecuted-Blue-People Action I’ve Seen in Ages! » 30ninjas

Avatar — The Best Damn Implausible Persecuted-Blue-People Action I’ve Seen in Ages!

Share on Facebook posted 12-19-09 by Angelo D'Argenio

So I just got in from watching James Cameron’s much-hyped opus, Avatar, the science fiction tale of an alien planet and its people fighting the good fight against a horrible invading race of humans. I really enjoyed this movie, but not for any of the reasons I was supposed to. Cameron made a big deal about creating a believable science fiction universe that he could bring to life on the big screen. He wanted a world that was real in its history, culture, and science, a world that was supremely believable in all aspects. This, the main selling point of the movie outside of the spectacular 3-D (and I will get to that later), was in fact, the only place the movie failed for me. The rest of the movie was spectacular, but I didn’t find Cameron’s universe or, for that matter, his central story “believable” for several reasons … which may just be the science geek in me screaming obscenities in the back of my head, but what the hell. Like I said, I truly enjoyed this movie and I have lots of good things to say about it … but let’s start by making some enemies and talking about the bad stuff first.

The plot is nothing special. In the future, the human race has killed its planet (cough, eco-preach, cough). Now, faced with a growing energy crisis and dwindling natural resources, they turn to Pandora, an earthlike moon in the Alpha Centauri star system which, outside of the humans’ meddling, is a verdant and pristine tropical rainforest complete with its own sentient native people (cough, eco-preach). The humans are obviously, with a few noble exceptions, horrible evil creatures who will gladly stomp all over sacred ground, shoot anything in their path, and destroy the natural ecosystem, all to get at rare unobtainium, a miracle mineral abundant in Pandora’s crust that could solve the energy crisis, feed the hungry, and hell, give you a blow-job considering how much this shit sells for. A bunch of clear-headed hippy scientists have enlisted in the Avatar program, an experiment which has you using high technology to download your mind into a home-grown human-alien hybrid body, so that you might interact with the natives, and thereby get around the whole unfortunate poisonous atmosphere thing. These scientists are, of course, more nature-friendly and culturally aware than the pig-headed human military, but one of them unfortunately gets shot back home before embarking on his mission, so his Avatar ends up going to his brother, an ex-Marine who was paralyzed from the waist down while on active duty.

Now if that wasn’t enough to cheaply tug at your heart-strings, just wait. This Marine is our main character, Jake Sully. Jake is tasked by the military and the huge evil mining corporation (Eco-Preach) to figure out how the native race of the Na’vi work. This is so that the humans can either persuade them diplomatically to move off their most sacred ground so the humans can start a mining operation there (Eco-Preach, Eco-Preach) or to just blow the shit out of them because they are flea-bitten savages who are worth less than we are because we have all the big machines (did I mention the Eco-Preach?). Jake rides his avatar into the middle of the wilderness, gets attacked by some huge ugly beasties, and is eventually rescued by the Na’vi princess Neytiri (she’s pretty hot, for an ass-kicking blue warrior-cat-creature, let it be said). He starts learning their ways and their religion, becomes a hunter in his own right, is accepted as one of the people, and falls in love with Neytiri. Unfortunately, the humans get antsy and decide to blow the whole goddamn thing up, because once again we humans are greedy little bastards with no redeeming qualities (I don’t think I can scream eco-preach any louder). Jake, however, decides to side with the Na’vi and leads them into battle against the humans and their disturbingly powerful machines, leading to a truly satisfying action sequence in which the way-large and powerful machines of the humans do battle with natives riding freaky, brightly-hued dinosaur-bird thingees.

Now many of you might have subtly noticed that this plot is a little eco-preachy, and that … is unfortunate. The whole shebang is the very definition of black and white. Apparently, the humans have offered food, medicine, education, and much much more to the Na’vi, but the Na’vi didn’t want any of that (even though it was more than enough to teach them fluent English). This is all in the movie’s back story, because we never really see anyone try to negotiate with the Na’vi all that much, even the scientists types who are supposed to be culturally aware. The humans, except for the few main characters who take a stand, are stereotypical comic-book caricatures of villains who seem to maim, kill, and destroy anything in their path and who look at everyone as beneath them, even though it is very clear that the Na’vi are sentient beings like us. You have your stereotypical hard-ass army officer, your ridiculously evil capitalist, your jughead Marine who seems to revel in his own manliness, and a massive number of human soldiers who never once think to question the genocide of a planet’s indigenous people.

The Na’vi, on the other hand, are these enlightened people who are in tune with Mother Nature, mostly through the use of the ability to biologically uplink with anyone and anything on the planet’s surface. Though they have no technology, they can heal and even transfer consciousness through the use of prayer, and through their understanding of the planet’s natural life-forms they are able to unrealistically combat gunships, helicopters, and cluster bombs with flying pterodactyl-like beasts. They are paragons of virtue with no flaws whatsoever because the hideous taint of modern convenience hasn’t made them fat, lazy, and disrespectful of nature. Come to think of it, I liked this whole plotline a lot better when it was called Disney’s Pocahontas. In short, no one in this movie acts like a real human being, or alien, or otherwise. They are very clearly “good guys” or “bad guys.” This plot is pure least common denominator. I’m not sure where the realism is supposed to kick in.

In my view, the realism never did quite kick in as I watched Avatar. Whereas James Cameron wanted this to be a movie where you didn’t have to suspend your disbelief, I was suspending it all the time. The life-forms on this planet were downright implausible at best and kind of goofy at worst. I couldn’t help but laugh every time I saw the spinny helicopter bugs that seemed to show up all too often. The whole biological upload/download thing was kind of cool, but you are never given a reason as to why the planet’s inhabitants evolved with these natural USB ports. The only people who use them are the Na’vi, but every beast has them, and many don’t use them at all! The dreaded Pandoran ecosystem supposedly forced Mankind to dial back its technology to operate, due to the massive magnetic fields that interfere with sophisticated equipment. Keeping this in mind, computers are frakkin everywhere! Hell, at one point they fly a mobile base right into the middle of what is supposedly the planet’s most powerful magnetic vortex, one that is so large it can levitate mountains! While there, all the cameras and computers work just fine! Hell, even the swanky psionic technology that allows humans to pilot their avatars works just fine. When the big climactic battle is fought right in the middle of this vortex, the most you ever see is some fuzz on the enemy’s instruments. Aircraft flies A-OK, even though they are made of metal, which for all intents and purposes should be totally unpilotable in a huge magnetic field. Bullets fly without having to compensate for curvature, and that is not even the worst part of it all. The old and gruff army guy says he was part of a first recon team sent to the planet. It takes 5 years to get to the planet (there is no light-speed travel in this universe, but 5 years is pretty damn close). Since the guy doesn’t look too much over 60, that means that this entire futuristic human mining camp had to be set up in about 40 years time. What the hell!?! There are huge self-enclosed bases with their own air systems and enough facilities to support hundreds or thousands of troops. How did they manage this in 40 years?! However, all of this, ALL OF THIS, is trumped by one simple fact. The giant robots that the humans pilot? The Amp Suits? In addition to massive guns and firepower, they also have a giant sized knife that they can pull out of their giant sized pocket. I shit you not. What genius of an engineer looked at a giant walking death machine and said, “You know what will make this marginally more deadly? A huge fucking knife.” Not only that, but Jake, our protagonist, fights off the giant robot with a knife while on foot in an Avatar body. Yes … the blue cat alien has a giant robot knife fight. I couldn’t make this shit up if I wanted to.

So that is about every problem I have with Avatar in a nutshell (well, all that and the ending theme song is just horrible). It’s a cookie-cutter morality plot set in an unbelievable world with a largely predictable ending. However, none of this, none of it at all, interfered with my enjoyment of the movie. Why? Because Avatar is a badly flawed premise that was done really, really well. In fact, I can’t even begin to tell you how well this movie was made. Regardless of its flawed plot and premise, Avatar is still a masterpiece, if only because of the technology used to make it. However, before I even get there, I need to give props where props are due.

The actors really tied this movie together. Everyone’s performance was spot on. Though the characters were cookie-cutter stereotypes, everyone’s performance was so believable I still ended up feeling for them. Sam Worthington and Zoe Saldana were awesome as the main characters, and they really made the love between Jake and Neytiri believable and pleasant to watch, not at all overly lovey-dovey. Everything from Sigourney Weaver’s portrayal of a hard-ass scientist to Stephen Lang’s hard-ass army colonel to Giovanni Ribisi’s hard-ass capitalist were just so well done and masterfully portrayed. You will have to look long and hard to find asses any harder on the big screen. The actors made the most of the material they were given, and considering how unfulfilling I consider the premise to be, this is saying a lot.

Speaking of the material they were given, though the premise was bad, the writing and direction were phenomenal. The pacing was spot on, and though the movie was 3 hours long and viewed through eye-straining 3-D glasses, I never felt like it was dragging. No plot elements, not even the hilariously evil ways of the humans, were harped upon. Cameron very tastefully decides not to divulge the details of Na’vi sex; he makes sure that love scenes are short enough to not become sickening while long enough to portray passion; he never overindulges the tragedy of a character’s death or of the destruction of the Na’vis’ home; all while still allowing the, well, humanity of the situation to grip you. Hell, one of the most important scenes in the movie, where Jake tames a giant Leona… Leonoptor… Leo… a giant flying thingy that the Na’vi consider sacred, is actually just omitted and replaced with a cut to black, and this is so artfully done it doesn’t feel like a tease at all. In fact, we already had a scene of Jake taming a smaller flying Banshee, so you don’t even notice that the second taming scene is mysteriously absent.

This is not to say that Cameron doesn’t lay the action on thick. Oh no no no, this movie is chock full of action. There are hunting scenes, hand to hand combat scenes, and of course the giant climactic battles of human against Na’vi. People are getting arrows through their skulls, entire tribes of Na’vi are getting shot with rail guns, huge fanged predators are biting people in half — it’s great! The action scenes don’t get old either, and none of it feels like action porn. The toppling of a gigantic tree was awesome both because it was sacred ground for the Na’vi and because there were giant explosions and fire and a shockwave that shook the very earth itself. The effects, simply said, are magnificent. Lots of the fight sequences were artistically done, and actually believable, as opposed to some other parts of the movie. Why do the Na’vi have a fighting chance? Well, the scientists got them some rifles and grenades. How does one native on a flying beastie take down a huge gunship? Throw some grenades into the jet engines. How do you stop all-terrain vehicles from pelting you with their mounted turrets? Stomp all over them with giant hammerhead rhinoceros thingies. Sweet!

Pretty much the whole movie is rendered in computer graphics, and let me tell you, it is like crack for your eyes. The whole thing is filled with such vibrant blues and greens and reds while the humans are all grey and shit-colored, as tends to be the case in the future. The jungles of Pandora really come alive on the movie screen, and everything moves realistically no matter how unrealistic it might be. The technology that Cameron used to capture Na’vi movement was genius, as even the tiniest twitch of a face muscle seems to be realistic. Sure, there is still the smooth clay-figure feel that most CGI has, but you definitely get thrown into the uncanny valley once or twice just because of how realistic everything moves. The animals, though alien, just seem to move as you would expect an alien with a body like that to move. The water effects, the plants, hell, everything is just so spectacular to look at!

Also, Cameron really hit this one out of the park by deciding to do it into 3-D. None of the 3-D effects are cheesy. Nothing comes right out of the screen at you. Nothing is flung toward you as an obvious reminder that you are wearing 3-D glasses. No, in fact throughout the movie, you tend to forget you are wearing 3-D glasses at all. The 3-D in this movie instead serves to give it a feeling of depth. The characters in the movie feel like they are in the room with you, rather than like they are poking shit at your face for no good reason. When ashes or embers fall you feel like you can touch them, when wood-sprites fly across the screen you feel like you can grab them, the whole thing feels like you can reach in and touch it, rather than having it reach out to touch you.

The experience is just so immersive; I don’t know where to stop ranting about it. You really feel as if you are one with Pandora as you watch the movie, which is basically what the whole movie is about. The characters claim that they are one with the environment, one with nature, and sitting there in the theater with the 3-D glasses on makes you feel the same. No matter how unbelievable Pandora may be when you sit back and examine it, Cameron did succeed in making you feel like you were really there, like you were transported to another world and are watching this through some sort of godly window, rather than just driving to some theater off a highway and sitting in a gum-stained seat. In fact, a big part of the movie is Ehywa, the massive superconsciousness that ties all of Pandora together. As the movie goes on, you start to feel as if you, the movie audience, is this Ehywa, an entity that is always on the outside looking in. You can see all of the action, and though you feel like you are really there, you cannot actually reach in to do anything about it. It effectively puts you, the audience member, in the role of the planet itself. Now that is quite a feat, Cameron, and I definitely applaud you for it.

My final verdict: Go see this movie. Don’t believe the hype machine. In fact, don’t bring any of the hype to the theater at all. Overhyping this movie is bound to set you up for a letdown. This is not the second coming of Jesus in movie form. This is not the best-lwritten plot in theaters right now. Hell, this is not even the new world that Cameron promised us up and down. However, one you look past all these promises, you see that Avatar is a massively enjoyable work of art, and a marvel of modern moviemaking technology. Go, sit down, get taken to Pandora, and enjoy. You won’t be disappointed.