December Movies — What We Have All Been Waiting For After a Year of Hype
What do you want for christmahanakwazaka little boy? Is it a movie? Is it a blockbuster movie? Is it one of the movies that Hollywood has been promising us for ages and still hasn’t delivered on!? That’s what we are asking for. This December, our theaters are going to be filled with movies that we have been waiting for since last December, and that is no exaggeration! Finally, we get to see what Hollywood has been promising us for so long. What is a real Christmas miracle, is the buzz surrounding these movies. Against all odds, people are still ranting and raving about how wonderful they are going to be. The rumors had us biting our fingers, the trailers wowed us, and now we get to finally plant our ass down in a theater seat and check them out. Of course, a little more hype can’t hurt. So here are some December films we have been waiting for!
The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus (Releases December 25, 2009)
The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus is one of those strange cult classic movies that just screws with your head until you don’t know what is up and what is down. The film is a near acid trip of stars including Christopher Plummer, Tom Waits, Lily Cole, Andrew Garfield, Verne Troyer, Johnny Depp, Colin Farrell, and Jude Law, however, the one reason why there is so much buzz about this movie, is that includes Heath Ledger’s final performance before his death. So whether you are a Heath Ledger fan, or whether you just want to see a mind fuck of a movie, The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus is the movie for you. Unfortunately, the movie releases exactly on Christmas Day so you will have to give up your caroling if you want to see this premiere. Still, it might make a nice family trip to fill up the buffer between the holidays and New Years.
Sherlock Holmes (Releases December 25, 2009)
If you aren’t one of the die hard Sherlock Holmes fans that are ranting about how this movie destroys a classic character, then you are probably one of the legions of people waiting to see Robert Downey Jr.’s sexy drunken Holmes adaptation. Sometime around the middle of the mass of Iron Man 2 buzz, it was revealed that Sherlock Holmes was going to be hitting theaters soon, and we were confused when we saw the trailer involving a belligerent Watson, a swarthy Holmes, and a repeatedly dying dog. Then we saw Holmes kicking some major ass and said “fuck yeah!” Truthfully, we still aren’t sure about the main premise behind this Holmes adaptation, but it looks pretty awesome. There are fight scenes, experiments, and tons of fanfic shipping fodder. Give it a look, if you have no other Christmas plans that is.
Avatar (Releases December 18, 2009)
… and here’s the biggie. James Cameron has been hyping up this massive sci-fi extravaganza for months … years even by telling us absolutely nothing about this massive 3-D world he was creating. Now, we know. We know about Pandora. We know about its race of blue skinned cat people. We know about the basic plot, of a paraplegic military man possessing the body of an “Avatar”, a genetically grown human/alien hybrid that can survive on the surface of Pandora, and his experience in interacting with the native alien population. We also know that the whole thing is going to be so graphically pleasing we are going to shit ourselves in our theater seats. Now, there is only one thing left to do … see the movie! Think of it as an early present for the holidays! Except … you have to pay for this present … and you’re not really getting anything … and James Cameron isn’t as jolly as Santa Claus.
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